Tantus Rumble Review
By Carnal Queen.
I was one of many people who stood on the sidelines, watching the excitement and impatience build for the launch of the Tantus Rumble. For months we knew it was coming, we saw teasers online and heard stories of its magnificence, and a few weeks ago, dreams turned to reality as the Rumble was finally launched. A wand vibrator for EVERY BODY … it’s a very bold claim to make isn’t it? But we know Tantus, we love what they produce, and one thing we all could be certain of, the Rumble was going to be a quality product – because that’s all the guys at Tantus do.
I was super excited to get one delivered to me for review. It doesn’t matter how many pictures you see, how many stats and write-ups you read, nothing can really prepare you for the reality of something when it’s right in front of you. Sometimes toys can be disappointing, but the first time I reached into the Rumble box, I knew it had already started to exceed my expectations visually and in terms of build quality and feel. It just feels right.
It’s light. Much lighter than you might expect from a toy that looks so substantial. Weighing only 190g, a huge part of the appeal of the Rumble is its accessibility and maneuverability. Immediately you know that you’re not going to tire just from holding it, and you know whichever way you hold it, it’s going to be comfortable. That’s a huge green tick in my book, because all too often toys discriminate against people with dexterity issues or weaker hands and wrists. Tantus are cool though, and they put some real thought into this design.
It’s beautiful to look at too. Blue is my favourite colour, and this particular shade is exactly what I chose to spray paint my first motorbike with. It was a Ford colour that I picked up from the part shop, and it glistened in the light. So it was a no-brainer that I’d love the colour of the Rumble … what can I say, this girl has taste. Tick.
The buttons have been put in a really great, convenient place. They click definitely when you press them, needing just the right amount of pressure to make them cooperate. No punching buttons until your fingers are sore just to make them work, and no more accidentally catching them by mistake, which can be a total disaster when you’re on the one way road to orgasmville. They light up too, so playing in the dark is easy, and they just look pretty cool. Another big tick.
It gets another tick for the shape and balance of the toy. It feels great when you’re holding it, whether that be to use on yourself or on someone else. Although the head end is heavier, the ergonomic shape means it sits well when in your hand. There aren’t any rough edges to catch you, and even though the body is hard plastic, it feels really comfortable to hold. The handle does carry some of those vibrations through it though, so if your hands are overly sensitive to this, they might not be too happy to be Rumbled.
Tantus do silicone. Tantus know how to own silicone and make it work in the way it’s needed – that head is genius. It’s so silky smooth, and it’s a breeze to pop the silicone cover off the head for cleaning. Don’t worry, you’re not going to knock it off by accident, but you’re not going to end up getting into a fight with it, and needing to put it in a headlock before it comes off. There’s flex in the neck, just enough though. It’s not a floppy fumbling thing, but it gives when you add pressure. Yep, another tick
Y’all want to know what the vibrations are like now, don’t you? The Rumble was never meant to be a contender to knock the Doxy off its perch. It was never going to go head-to-head with anything with a mains plug attached to it. I don’t think it was ever really supposed to sit against cordless wands either. The Rumble is different. The name evokes notions of what it’s going to be like, and it’ll depend on how you’ve interpreted that name personally, as to whether you’re satisfied or disappointed. The vibrations rumble, no surprises there really, but they do cross over to being slightly buzzier as you go up the scale. There’s 3 constant speeds and 4 patterns to keep you entertained. They feel like really good quality vibrations, not these surfacey shitty things that tickle everything except your fancy. They penetrate nicely into your body, they feel good. If you’re expecting a powerhouse behind that depth of vibration though, you might be left with a sad face.
The Rumble IS powerful, don’t get me wrong, but power is subjective. Is it the most powerful vibrator I own? No. Is it powerful enough to produce some great orgasms? Well yes it is. Technically.
Here’s where I come unstuck. The power and rumble are good, they feel great, but the Rumble doesn’t tick my orgasm box, and that’s because of the head. The head that I love the concept of, but that leaves me frustrated and annoyed. I’ve fought long and hard with the Rumble, trying to conjure up ways to consistently reach a happy climax. I can’t do it. I feel like it’s beaten me, and I’m so, so sad about it.
The head is too broad and flat for me personally. Whilst the power would easily be enough in the right circumstances, that head stops me from seeing much of it. It’s not powerful enough to penetrate my whole vulva area like the Doxy is, and if I move my labia out of the way and focus it directly on my clit, the vibrations are too diffused in the area. Catching the edge of the head, so the angle is nestling against my clit is better, but it’s no pleasure party. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. I can spend 30+ minutes trying to get myself really going with it, and ultimately end up getting bored. That’s not what I wanted my Rumble experience to be.
Despite its miserly attitude towards giving me orgasms, I still really do like the Rumble. It’s great to grab for an impromptu shoulder massage, and because it’s light and quiet for this type of toy, you can slot this into a busy day with ease. It also feels pretty cool when pushed against the base of a butt plug. That flat head means the vibrations travel straight into the plug unhindered, so you can really shake what your Mama gave you. I really wish it was waterproof, I’d love to be able to take this in the shower with me, but alas, it wasn’t meant to be, the Rumble is only splash-proof.
Maybe the launch of the additional heads will be what’s needed to make me tremble in excitement at the thought of being Rumbled. Perhaps it will give me the direct stimulation that will allow the vibrations to work their magic on me. I’m confident they have what it takes, they’re just a little tied up at the minute. I’ve tried fashioning something onto it with my Suction Cup, but that was a flop – it didn’t stay on, and the void between the head and concave cup base meant the vibrations were mostly lost anyway. Boo.
The Tantus Rumble is a vibrator for every body. It didn’t work for mine, but then I always knew I was a little strange. Luckily, there are two bodies in CQ towers, and CK is nearly always a willing guinea pig. I threw him the baton and asked him to tell you all what he makes of the Tantus Rumble – you can read his thoughts here.
Tantus set out to do something different. Something that was more inclusive, that catered for everyone. I think they’ve made really good inroads with it, and I’m really hoping that those heads hold the key to happy bodies everywhere.
Tantus kindly sent me the Rumble for free, in exchange for an honest and unbiased review. This in no way alters my thoughts or experiences. If you’d like to purchase a Rumble for yourself, you can do so here. CARNALQUEEN15 gets you 15% off Tantus purchases – happy shopping folks! Affiliate links have been used in this post.